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What mom taught us

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Me at age 5. Yes there are missing teeth and big ears.
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
"If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me RELIGION:
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that’s why."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep crying and Ill give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you *look* at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You’ll sit there til all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a cyclone swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times – don’t exaggerate!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do!"

Thanks Mom, Love You!

19 responses »

  1. You were a very cute kid!!
    My mom taught me all of those things and I taught them to my kids too.  LOL

  2. OMG i think we are sisters LOL.

  3. Thanks for the reminder!  My mother taught me everyone of those things! Cute picture!  Hope your knee is better!  Have a great day.  Hugs

  4. Oh yes, I think I\’ve heard those things a time or two!

  5. I think our Mothers were related! I have used a few of those myself. I\’m sooo embarassed.

  6. Oh I loved this.  I have said just about all of these to my kids!!!

  7. UH Huh, brings back memories. You were a pretty girl at five. hugs, Sidney

  8. Whoa, do we all have the same mother, lol.  Heard many of them myself.
    Hugs Terry

  9. I like the cutie at the the top.  I am laughing at the teachings from your mother.  we all had simular ones.  I guess it would also be a trip down memory lane.  Hugs to you and may God bless!

  10. Lizzie-Beth4Him

    The "motherisms" are great and you were and are a cutie.  I would have enjoyed having you in my class as a teacher.  You\’ve got that twinkle in your eye.

  11. Hey how do you know my mom so well?

  12. Ahhh, to be young again.

  13. I bet the boys were chasing you around the playground.

  14. Your mom reminds me of my own mother, cheers ladies for raising us even when we made it difficult!!! 🙂
    Great post by the way!!!  🙂

    HaHa… Good ones. The last one on Envy might be my favorite.
    I\’m updating my little black book after that last blog I wrote and just wanted to know…
    Are you a moaner and a screamer?

  16. Yep, some of these remind me of my mother. Thank God (for Ana\’s sake) I did not turn out like her.

  17. My mother taught me to fear the words, "Young man, you just wait till you dad comes home."!!  Yes ma\’am, the razor strop for me.  And I had it coming every single time.  Oh, almost forgot.  My mother taught me to move out and find my own place to clean.

  18. Hi, I came in from over at your space.. love your humor..and this post is priceless.. I have heard those same words.. and even have spoken some of them my my kids.. "laughing"..and "rolling eyes"great post..sorry to hear about your knee, hope it heals soon..and your halloween photos are fantastic..looks like the dogs had fun dressing up as well.have a beautiful day..

  19. I loved the doggie pics!  Too funny.  ALL of them!!  Oh Yeah!  I heard all of those lines from my Mom.  More than once!
    I really hope the Rays win their series.  I would love to see a Rays/Phillies World Series.  Oh yeah… plus I hate the Red Sox. lol 
    Hope you\’re having a Great weekend
    PS   That photo of you was taken 20 years ago, right??


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