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Living Will form

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Often in my job I am instructed to do a living will
for one of our client. Actually, we do them for ALL of our clients.
Terri Shiavo was a local case and we often received phone calls from
the media for opinions. Soooo, here is my version of a living will.
I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not
wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no
circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians
who couldn’t pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or
doctors interested in simply running up the medical bills. If a
reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of
the following:

______a Bloody Mary

______a Margarita

______a Scotch and water

______a glass of wine

______ a Vodka and Tonic

______a Steak

______Lobster or crab legs

______the remote control

______a Bowl of ice cream

______ a round of golf

______Chocolate

______Sex

If none of the above has happened, it should be presumed that I won’t
ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby
instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug,
reel in the tubes and call it a day. At this point it is time to call
the New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come do their thing at my funeral,
and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses to toast the good times
we have had.

On a serious note: Please blogging buddies, make
your wishes known. If you don’t have a living will, get one. If you
can’t find one, email me. The very least you should do is not force
your family and friends to make the decision for you.
BTW- Which options did you check?
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9 responses »

  1. Should not sex be at the TOP? It is on mine lady! Sigh.
     
    Oh, and thanks for your pearls of wisdom in my quest for answers!
    Sometimes it IS better to just walk away slowly and not answer!

    Reply
  2. Chocolate and SEX…all the way, baby!!
     
    Missed you, Wendy!!
     
    HUGS!!  🙂

    Reply
  3. I absolutely loved that.  Yes, Jim and I have a living will, power of attorney and healthcare power of attorney.  Everyone should have them.
    Steak, ice cream and chocolate!

    Reply
  4. LOL! Oh you poor girl! You live in the land of sun and fun! Is there not laws against NOT having fun on the weekend there?!

    Reply
  5. I like your version much better than the boring legal mumbo jumbo.  At least, it realistic.  

    Reply
  6. Where\’s the beer?

    Reply
  7. I\’m going to print out your version of a Living Will! If I don\’t ask for a margarita…I\’m a goner so let\’s not prolong things, shall we?
     
    Just smother me with a pillow. I won\’t put up too much of a fight. Just tell me we\’re out of tequila.

    Reply
  8. Very good advice!  My family & friends know my wishes and I have them written out and in my safe.
    Thanks for sharing and spreading the word.
    hugs,
    Molly

    Reply
  9. This is soooooo good … LOL.
    OMG … Funny!!!!!
    I checked off the Vodka &Tonic. I haven\’t had sex in almost three years (I could even tell ya by number of hundreds of days .. lol), so I drink alot to have at least one form of fun .. lol.
    ~Nooner~

    Reply

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